Here I am in my 12th week of not having a full time job and am I having fun.
Let's rephrase that.
Am I having fun?
It's not too bad, though there is no sign of rain after the long drought (full-time job metaphor). Now I'm sounding like some old and grizzled native American - next I'll be examining buffalo spoor and predicting a bad winter of many moons.
It occurred to me that to be in this position of being able to blog about my many redundancies my ancestors must have survived all life's many perils to have reached breeding age, must have bred successfully and passed on the gene pool eventually to me ("All that evolution and this is what we get? Not a world statesman?") That means surviving plagues, wars, invasions, murder, accidents and so on. Now I know that many characteristics can be handed down via the genes through the generations. As I seem to have a special skill at being made redundant I thought I'd do some genealogical research and see if this skill can be traced back through time. I've found some quite interesting results. Come with me back through time therefore and let's have a look at some Eyes on the Prize ancestors.
I assume that as feudal serf, and therefore an early form of sole trader, it was nigh on impossible to be made redundant by oneself. Still the Eyes value innovation and may have found a way but we have no early records to tell us otherwise. There is a tantalising Roman name scratched into the wall of the amphitheater in Usk, that of Gaius Eyesus Praemium. Maybe we'll be able to find out more as the excavations continue.
The earliest ancestor I can find plausible proof of is a scribe on Lindisfarne whilst the Venerable Bede was in residence. Employed as a proof reader for the Chronicles of St Cuthbert, Brother Eyez, as he was indeed known, thought he was onto a job for life scanning the manuscript for mistakes which, when found, he would strike through with a quill dipped in red ink causing a complete rewrite of the page and much merry comment from the Brother monk who had written and illustrated it. Of course, the chronicles recount, he hadn't calculated the cost of red ink made from the thousands of bodies of red ants and lost his job in a monastery cost cutting exercise then left. The records do not say where for. Fortunately his departure preceded a Viking raid on Lindisfarne where all present were put to the sword. His zeal for corrections undoubtedly saved his life.
The next ancestor of note can be found in the Chronicles of St Neot dealing with the life of King Alfred, King of England (871 -899). Employed as a pastry chef for Alfred, Eyeus son of Eyeus, was made redundant after the Danes forced Alfred into hiding and Alfred lost his tax revenue. No doubt this loss of his favourite chef was a major contributory reason for Alfred burning the cakes - he had lost his skilled retainer and cook books and made a hash of the cooking himself. History records the scolding Alfred received from the wife who asked him to look after the the baking. It does not record what happened to Eyeus son of Eyeus. However, following his deliberations during the cooking, Alfred managed to push the Danes back from Wessex to East Anglia and thus saved the lives of many English people including, we assume, that of Eyeus.
We find references to Eye Evans ap Llewellyn in the Welsh Marches. The Book of The Mabinogion is one of Wales' greatest contributions to European literature and is fortunate that we find a tiny reference to Eye Evans. Employed as a dog handler for Prince Llewelyn ap Iowerth's dog Gelert, Eye Evans was "let go, sorry boyo" by the Prince citing the taxes imposed by the English. Of course we all know of the result of the Prince leaving his infant son in the care of Gelert - how would history have been changed if Eye Evans had kept his job?
The final extract from history today concerns the Brothers Eyes. Labouring as barrel carriers in London in 1605 they were employed by a certain Guido Fawkes to carry barrels of "salt herring" into the cellars under the Houses of Parliament and then stay to guard them before, said Mr Fawkes, the famous herring eating party he had arranged for November the 5th. It seems that Guido ran out of money on the 4th of November and made the brothers redundant when he found he could not pay them but forgot to take the key for the cellar from them. When the plot was discovered, and Guido tortured, he was asked where the key was - "The Eyes have it" he is said to have replied and so the saying stuck until this day in the House of Commons. If the brothers had stayed until the herring party...well this blog may not have been written.
So there you have it.
Redundancy does appear to run in the Eye DNA, an evolved and evolving skill that is passed down from generation to generation. But it also seems that skill has helped keep the family line safe during the perils of evolution.
Chance, luck, coincidence, miracle?
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